My dear RetroRewind; we meet again. Allow us safe passage back into the year, 1989 and I will allow your life force to be sustained by the accumulated energy of the helpless eyeholes gazing helplessly at their monitors. Shit, I think they heard me!

Hi there! Yesterday we brought you the gripping tale of what happens when Leisure Suit Larry Goes Looking For Love (In Several Wrong Places). Today we will move onto the third of the tales of Larry; Larry Laffer. (By the way, anyone else here Larry’s iconic giggle every time they read his name?) Onward we go into a story that goes back to the roots of the original game. A game filled with sexual innuendos, lewd humor, pixelated nudity, and all the late-80s humor that they could stuff into a single game. Strap on (hehe) your seatbelt as we journey back to Nontoonyt Island for Leisure Suit Larry III: Passionate Patti in Pursuit of the Pulsating Pectorals!

Leisure Suit Larry 3 Title Screen

Forgive the giant fist entering Patti's name, because I had a joke to put here except now I'm giggling like an idiot.

An undisclosed number of years has passed since last we saw Mr. Laffer and many things have changed. Nontoonyt Island has turned into the tourist-baiting paradise the natives have always dreamed of. Hotels, casinos, and clubs spread out across most of the island and the natives have formed their own company, aptly named Natives Inc. Larry is still married to Kalalau and has let island living get the better of him. What I mean to say is that Larry has become quite the rotund gentleman. This, likely as well as a new-found appreciation of the female form has led Kalalau, Larry’s 2nd wife, to the decision of leaving him for a woman; which is the last we see of her. This leaves Larry heartbroken and despondent. What is a hawaiian shirt wearing sexual dynamo to do when the love of his life leaves him for some random Amazonian Harley-riding former-cannibal slot-machine repairwoman? Continue reading